4 Weeks Left

Is it August already..

But first.. let me take a selfie..

~need to get this out of my system~

Thank you Menard :) Click it..

As a teenager- I had an awful case of acne.. and my face were quite dark. I just had a really bad skin. I blame this on puberty. Diet? no, I ate a lot better as a teenager compared as an adult (true story). I have tried :

1. Johnson2 facial (really bad)

2. Palmolive facial soap

3. Olay (really bad)

4. Proactive 

5. Likas Papaya soap

6. Nano

I was introduced to this product somewhere in 2001 while I was browsing around the city right after my computer class. Long story short- I got a free facial analysis and a free 1 session facial. After the 3rd session- I felt a significance difference. I had to stop going after the 5th as it was really eating up on my allowance (to the extend it was eating up my class expenses). Below are the products that I have recently use. 

1. The Soap

Its feels like the Likas Papaya soap, but it doesn't leave my face feeling too dry. 

It does leaves that fresh tingling feeling right after using it like a facial scrub- but its gentle to be use for every wash. 

I love it!

(It does smell a bit weird though-- it smells a bit like Brylcreem)

Don't judge it by its exterior. Its a great product! 

2. Moisturizer

I never like wearing moisturizer because on most occasion it leaves my face really oily. But not this miracle tube. I can't describe in words how wonderful my face feels once i massage this on my face. It immediately absorbs in my skin. Although it feels a bit oily to the touch, but after really massaging it in- my skin feels really rejuvenated. 

I love how water base it is. 

I would usually top it off with nano facial spray. 

Just for feeling fabulous really~

3. Toner

This is not a toner. As labelled on the box- its actually a makeup remover. But the beautician instructed me to use it like a toner. I rarely use it though, and I use it as a makeup remover (I'm stubborn that way). I only use it before putting on makeup as a wipe cleanser and after, after removing my makeup .

It is beautifully package and the liquid looks really magical. 

Apparently, the intake in this blog, didn't come out as I had planned. Though that doesn't mean I'm not enthusiastic about my BIG day. Maybe because.. its not as I have always envisioned how getting married would actually be.

Yes, I had predicted the whole documentation part of marriage was going to be very tedious. I'm lucky that I had a lot of assistance from my sister and my fiancé- was huge worry wart. His maticulous planning helped a lot. We managed to get it all done 2 months past. He and I made a great team! 

As much as I love to go on about my awesome future hubby, this blog will be about preparing becoming a bride. This entry will be on ...

Ergh.. I don't even want to type out the bloody word.  So, this weight issue - its nothing new really. Been struggling since 2000- right after the necessity of wearing school uniform was no longer required. And we live in a skinny society where good clothes are only in size S or XS. But it was only in my late 20's did I really let myself go. I could go on and on with my sobbed stories, but the bottom-line is- I need to lose weight. Never in my adult years would I have imagined that weight would be such a huge issue for my wedding. NEVER.   Anyways, just to share- I have found 1 miraculous products that I had successfully lost 5kg in a month time without exercising and dieting. But before I go in details. Let me just list down on other things I have taken.. 1. Jamu pills & liquid  2. Herbal-life (protein drinks) 3. Manjakani juice 4. Prune juice 5. lots and lots of random pills..  I'm sorry kidneys -- be strong.  You might have heard it, and I have stumbled upon this product through the constant advert on my newsfeed on Facebook. Garcinia Cambogia. Click it. 

The capsule were the ones I ordered.. only to discover.. it's not Halal.. 

Good news is the liquid juice ones are and news have it, it works a lot better than the capsule. Logically because it's in liquid form and that it absorb a lot faster in your body. It's about RM170++ per bottle, it smells nice and sweet-- but not so much in the taste department. 

So.. brushing all the getting fit and getting pretty aside.. I'm really stressed out, depress even. Though I'm sure all brides to be felt the same. But I never knew how really intense it is. 

I really wish all I had to worry about for my wedding is the expenses involve for the kenduri. Now I just want to get this whole wedding over with and just relax with my hubby.
The dieting is really depressing me. Not because I can't just attend to my every lust and desire I have for food, but simply because- why should I be so stress out thinking what my guests would say during my wedding day..
Maybe its work.
Maybe its the stress of having to deal with the mother of the bride.
Maybe worrying about what's to come afterwards with the family of my future hubby.

I hate it how my own family reminds me of not having to eat late night, no snacking, no this and no that-- and the constant reminder of how fat and big I am.. Worse- pin pointing to certain areas where I'm having problems with. It hurts and I handle it by either sleeping it off and just sit on my bum and fiddle around with my phone. 

I feel alone and hopeless, thinking the amount of money I have used to lose weight. The pain I go through earlier for my morning jog-- but to completely gain back the weight after 2 days full meal- which had took me a whole week and a half to lose. The word 'frustrated' can't describe how I feel each time I go on the weight scale. The time I hold onto hunger pangs and cramps. The time I have to sit through in my working clothes with sweats in the tropical humid local weather. 

I wish I can say that all of this is going to be worth it. But how can it be if I'm not happy?